It has been a while since I have posted anything here.  I have been both busy and lazy.  During this time, a question kept nagging me.  What is happiness, and why aren’t we always happy?  That is a questions I have struggled with over the last year.

First off, what is happiness?  Is it a state or a decision?  Can you be happy and still have other emotions that might be considered negative?  I think the answer to all of those is yes.  Happiness is a state of being where you are at least content with where you are at.  Sometimes, it is a decision to be happy.  Many people say, “fake it until you make it,” but the problem with that is you start believing you are happy when you really are not.  This causes people to settle for things in life that make them unhappy.

So, why are we not all happy  all of the time?  Life.  I have been divorced, lost my job, and sued in a short manner of time.  No matter what, I always looked at the positives.  These life events made me realized a few things.  I was not happily married.  I found myself angry and upset most of the time at home.  That job I was eliminated from?  I hated it.  I only stayed there because they paid me too much to do very little actual work, but the job and culture turned toxic years ago.  The lawsuit?  Well, that was not really my fault, but that is the reason I carry insurance.

What does all of this prove?  Probably nothing, but to me it proves that bad things happen in life.  Sometimes, just sometimes, it makes you realize you were not happy after all, and it shows you why not.  From there, you can do things that make you happy and not repeat the mistakes of the past.  Working for myself might not pay as well, but I do not have to worry about coat-riding fucktards that get all of the credit for work they never did while I get told to do less work so some foreigner can take my job.  I might not be in the best place and really happy yet, but I am in a much better place than I was last year.  I’ll take it.